I have no idea what happened but last night and tonight Lillian has fought sleep like nobody's business. She gets so fussy and tired and I try to bounce her and rock her and swaddle her and all three at the same time, but she wants no part of it. I know she's tired but she can't calm down, which might be my fault if she's overtired, but she wakes up at 7pm and I feed her and get her ready for bed and then start the whole bedtime process by 7:35/7:40, so it's not like she's been awake for 3 hours. I even tried to drive around with her tonight and that didn't work. I can't nurse her to sleep (sadly) because when she doesn't want to eat anymore she makes it very clear. Ugh! I just want to get into a decent bedtime routine and it's not happening. Although I know it's still early, since she's only 4 weeks old. I can't remember when we got B into a bedtime routine but I know once we did it worked like clockwork.
I feel bad admitting this, but I want time to pass quickly because I don't enjoy the newborn phase very much. I'd like to fast forward to 4-5 months old, when the babies start to smile and laugh, and when they actually have some sort of predictable sleep routine. And last night I was up with Lillian for almost three hours trying to get her back to sleep after I fed her. It's so frustrating. I just want to sleep again.